CHEATING

most of you have watched cheaters on K24, and if not, at least you have heard of it. it airs daily, but the original show from North Texas started in the year 2000 and has over 200 episodes and has 10 seasons. considering that the cases are mostly concentrated in a very small area, they are staggering statistics. in my point of view, this is a very sound business idea. genius actually...you have detectives, counselling, lawyers, the tv itself and obviously ads.... never mind that the whole thing is a hoax.but that's beside the point. many of the victims in the series are women. it's rare to find a man being cheated on by a spouse.

its known for a fact that women think with their hearts and as for us men...that organ would be our dicks. it's unfortunate, sometimes we try very hard but... if you watch the show carefully enough, you would realize no man just cheats. there are reasons, most of them very valid. personally, i have strayed on numerous occasions, and if you asked me why, i would give you plausible reasons. if the sex is not good enough and i tell her but she still does not work on it, if she can not listen to my problems and i get a lady who does, with time one thing will lead to another, when all your girl does is whine and nag all the time and mostly when we have just got to bed and i just want some time to recap my day and plan the next one, when your girl starts rationing sex.... the reasons are many and vary from person to person. t not only men are cheating though. statistically, younger people are more likely candidates of cheating; in fact, younger women are as likely as younger men to be unfaithful. it's a problem that faces us all.

i have always had this weird wish...that i would walk in on my spouse cheating on me with another man. think of that old R Kelly and P Diddy(then known as puff daddy) song-Satisfy you. yeah weird...i know.  it would be devastating, but the events that would follow... i would just walk out. eventually she would come crying and begging you to take her back and the apologies. there's nothing that's more satisfying. if she wouldn't come back, to bad. it wasn't worth the stress in the first place. because relationships are stress most times. another song that comes to mind is the longs series of songs by R Kelly-trapped in the closet. it would hurt 10 fold if it came to your knowledge that your spouse was cheating on you with someone of the same sex. do not lie to yourself that you would be singing 'my girl got a girlfriend'. the question that will obviously play over and over in your head would be...'WTF?' what could have driven her that far away? even if you eventually had a  threesome. as is common knowledge one of the participants is an outcast  and you do not need to second guess who that would be.

there are many remedies to cheating. the liberal ones would say polygamy. the kinky ones would swing. crazy ones let their spouses have sex with other people as they watch. what i think...communication. if i got what i wanted from whoever it was that i'm dating, i would't stray. after all, all vagainas are just that and so are boobs and arses. however, if i told you the girl i preffered this and she said she would work on it but didn't.then i reminded her again...and again, but nothing. TOO BAD. if you can't do it, i would respect your decision. but if it is so important to me, we would just break up.in marriage, that's tricky...

references:

cheaters being a sham-http://thatunfreshfeeling.blogspot.com/2009/11/cheaters-was-fraud.html

cheating stats-http://www.menstuff.org/issues/byissue/infidelitystats.html

MEN AND GETTING INTO RELATIONSHIPS

yesterday i talked about how women are selfish with well....almost everything. the thing is, we keep supporting them. i will mention my being single for more than a year...again. i have had a couple of chicks on my list, but the allure of a chase sipped out of me long time. playing hard to get to me is ancient.we live in a world where we can't afford to waste any time let lone resources, we are always up and down doing this or that. but there are other reasons i am still single. i search for 2 things in a girl. one, tht we can communicate and understand each other. if we can not make useful conversations no reveal our thoughts and feelings to each other, how would we date? second, that i can at least present you to my pals. if i wouldn't be comfortable with you around them, it would't work out.that's why most the girls i know have never met my close circle of pals...nothing personal. another issue that i consider, is equality in the relationship.

they say in every relationship there's always one who reaches out and another who is reached out for. i can't date you if it looks like i am doing myself a favor by dating you. if you are the only one who calls, foots the bill, seems like you are getting cheated on most of the time...it ain't worth it. according to me, for  relationship to be balanced,the chick has to be the one reaching out. from history we have heard women marrying men who are older, taller, more muscular. it was all about safety those days. these days, the physical part of relationships has been undermined. or rather, we pretend that we do not care, but we are just living in denial. in relationships where one feels inadequate, they tend to do weird things. low self esteem shouldn't exist in a relationship mostly on the man's part. being the man in a relationship is not possible if you are feeling inadequate.

i remember my first chick. i vibed her for more than a year. that was in 2003, you remember when we still had land lines in our homes. after homework, i would call this chick, almost daily. unluckily for me, it was mostly her mum or dad who picked and they had to then divert me to her.this went on for months, i called and we often talked for a while, but i never got much reciprocation.i asked her to be my girl but waited for like two terms just to be told, 'i would, but i'm afraid of how Shem(another guy in class who had set sights on her) would feel'. so i went on that long December holiday distraught, but come the next year, my final year, i was back to my normal self.free of burden. luckily or unluckily,Shem transfered to another school so  didn't make it beginning of the year. i was indifferent about the whole issue, it was obvious i wasn't really wanted.weeks passed then events started unfolding. some girls started up the whole issue of how Shem was now out of the picture, i took to it, popped the question again and this time i was accepted to my delight. it was a crazy relationship. we never did anything, not even hold hands, kissed just once by accident and what hurt me most is that on valz wen i shop liffted that gift i mentioned some time back, almost the whole class had a taste of it, most except me of course.

you do not want a woman sitting on your head. ask someone who has a woman for a boss, they know.so if you are not at par with a chick in a relationship, u better off not being with her. think about it...