TELL WOMEN WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR....

have any of you been on 2go?the IM application on phone?i think its an arena of sex-craved people. i love it though, not because i am sex craved...but because i love sex. and well, i get to meet crazier people than I. as i was telling my boys yesterday, on friday night, i added 3 chicks from a chat room. in private chat, the 1st request two of them had was 'send me a pic of your dick'. no way i was doing that. i can't even imagine the process of taking a pic of my dick. as soon as they both realized i wasn't going to 'dick' them, i was kicked off their friends list. in less than 1 min of chatting and 5 sentences. CRAZY!!!
that was just a pointer, my main reference from 2go would come a couple of weeks ago.i had had major blue balls for some time.so this day, i'm from town and exhausted to the core. i get to the house, slop on the bed and get online before sleep has its way with me. then in the chat room some chick comes with this phrase(i can't really remember it) but she just wanted to get laid. well....so did i. so i add her. 1st question. where are you? i was in south c, and her nairobi west. she has her own place. so she starts these background questions about what i do and all. this whole time i'm pressing for us to meet soon. i just catch a mat and would be in nairobi west in 10mins. my sleep was even long gone. questions continue to flow and we realize we in the same universities. then, she asks what year...and i tell her. then again asks if i know a guy in class and i'm like...yeah i do. and just like that...she said 'bye' and we never chat again.BUZZKILL!!. so this chick has already sent me her photos and she is fly as hell and DTF

(down to fuck). i had to to know what happened. happens this guy she asked about was the best friend of her ex and has all her skeletons in his pocket.
i've heard just recently that ladies do not mind being lied to, as long as they do not catch you at it. the secret to laying a chick, or getting her to like you, is telling her what she wants to hear. as long as you know what she likes, play along and do not veer of the course. when the truth comes out or she realizes you have voids in your story that you just decided not to tell, shit begins then.but at least you will have got what you wanted. think of it as a 'release clause'. had i known this earlier....rephrase. i knew this earlier but i do not like lying. i think its too much work.i will have to keep a whole journal to know what lies i told which girl because they are just many in my life...the girls that is.hahaha
yesterday, a close crew of girls we normally hang out with decided to write a diss letter(as a joke) about me n ma boys. now i just did not get the sense behind this. we knew if we dissed them back, they would probably never talk to us. because i know i got shit on them...a lot. i was for the idea we hit them with all the low blows we can. but it comes down to, what would they want to hear. so guys drafted a soft diss.....very soft.3 of my boys are seeing 3 girls the other side. how much sulking do you think they would have received?
there are many examples of how knowing what a girl wants to hear and telling her just that would get you real far. and telling her what she does't, would get you in trouble if you had planned anything. husbands have this situation. when just before you sleep and you are with your wife in bed talking about the events of the day. then she mentions the soap she watches and how that main actor is a real hunk, she would do anything to get him.....and she goes on...and on. but mention the same and you won't get laid for months. and don't stare at another girl's ass... sacrilege.

just know the right buttons to push and you can get any girl you want.

cheers

LOVE LETTERS & POETRY!!

love is an non-comprehensible thing.you love someone but still cheat on them, mostly men. people in love would give up everything, even their lives, to be with that person they love.(think romeo and Juliet...bonny and Clyde) you may have sex with a girl you do not like and after you ejaculate, you do not want to see her again. you are off the bed, in your trousers and off. but after making love to a person one likes or loves, you want her to lie on your chest, hold her, watch her sleep or even if you get up, it would be to make her breakfast and serve t in bed.

there are many forms that have been used to express feelings and emotions. love letters and poems i think are so far the most common, since ancient days and until now.y'all have been trough high school. those adolescent days when love and the opposite sex was almost all you thought about. of at least 4 nights in a seven night week, i'd spend my prep writing if not reading a letter over and over to get what was really being communicated. at that time when i really did not write any poetry, i would copy some Shakespeare lines and throw them in there, we would use opening lines like WAKAPANGALAPANGLASHIZZLE(whatever that meant, it did not matter), we'd lace the letter with cheap perfume. considering that most major high schools in Kenya are single boarding schools, a letter was almost all you had as a form of communication to the opposite sex in a far of school.
for like two or so years now, the poetry buzz in Nairobi has been phenomenal. these days, almost everybody can string words together(check the latest notes from your friends. most are poetry). we have events weekly. of different kinds, hosted by different people and attracting different audiences. so now think off all that buzz in just one place...i present to you the poster on my front page. and i'm the man behind the scenes....that's how a guru works. i rocked you with a poem from the archives that i'm sure most of you liked. so come witness....may be i may even perform. not until Shakespeare does a collabo with Eminem.
cheers.

YOU ARE MY TREASURE(Meddy guru)

you are my treasure,

the most valued from all this girl-mine!

that's a pleasure,because you are mine.

giving me so much pleasure,you get me high like wine so fine.

my relaxation and leisure,

you inspire in me what's divine but with no define.

my serenity like the sky that's azure,

and like it lets the sun, you make me shine.

i'm tranced they say i have a seizure,

its because people don't think on cloud nine.

i think of asia, your purity like an unadulterated shrine.

  n this closure,i hope we are thine.

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=148302308576188

IF YOU ARE IN NAIROBI, YOU CAN'T AFFORD TO MISS THIS

FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN MEN & FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN WOMEN!

i loved boston legal, it was a master piece of a series. i also have good memory of how it ended(i finished it a fortnight ago). denny crane and allan shore got married. before y'all rush into judging, get to know the reasons. denny had Alzheimer's and was bound to die. he was way richer and couldn't transfer money to allan without it being subjected to crazy tax cuts yet allan needed to start a new firm. there was also the case of euthanasia that denny wanted allen to perform on him in case he became in a worse of state and in severe pain. and finally, in his depreciating state of mind, he needed to be able to tell his best friend all his secrets but also not exposing him to  suits in case they came up. the only way this could be done  was through marriage. so where do guys draw the line and say, 'we you are my boy no doubt, but not that?' 
i remember some time ago when angelina jolie was shooting Good shepherd with matt damon. at this time, she was like a year or so into a relationship with brad, who is a close friend to matt from the oceans films. for matt it was weird to have a sex scene with angelina but as for her...."It's one of those things where it's like the least threatening person. The difference between kissing Matt and kissing Brad is simple: One's a friend and one's my lover." let your friend have sex, even though feigned, with your woman for money? would you marry you male best friend for pretty good reasons?
women have this attachment thing in them. they re so emotional and all. which is good, i love my mum more than dad no doubt and detest the fact that my children will love their mum more than me.the same sentiment is shared by many people out there. women can call themselves 'sweety' and 'honey' 'mrembo'...but a guy can't pull that on another guy. it has even become common place for girls kissing these days. they do it all the time. sometimes they are just too drunk and horny and some other times, they are just being girls. where as girls have sleep overs where they bond and talk mostly about...us, our idea of a sleep over is play play station all night or sleeping on the floor after a wild night out full of drinking, grinding women asses and mad fist pumping. but you can NEVER call it a sleep over.

here are some of the differences between friendships between men and women:


1. a chick can't date her close friend's ex. but as for guys, there should be no bad blood. we have been through this...:P about hooking up....that's tricky.
2. guys can't call each other love dovey names as chicks do. it is so gay. most of the nick names our friends give us are disses in a way or a reflection of something one did and ain't proud of. its how we are.

3. the groom should fuck the stripper on bachelor's night. most don't and they egret it for the rest of their married lives.the brides maid should do the male stripper the other side of town. hahahahaha

4. guys do not have sleep overs. even if we plan on meeting and spending the night together playing play station,watching the champions league or watching lord of the rings, we can not call it a sleep over. NEVER!
5. for men, paying close attention to a pals life is weird. that is why we may meet every day and chat about football, girls, cars and business but never ask about your family. it is how we were tailored. women wil want to know each and every detail about their friends. men give space.
6. let the women kiss, have sleep overs and cry on each others shoulders. let men have each other's backs, especially in crime and as wing men. 

7. professionalism can only go so far. as a man sometimes you have to draw the line and say you can not do that. call it a balls moment.


i may add on this list with time, that's all i can think of at the moment though. cheers.

BONNIE & CLYDE(poem from the archives)

i'm d strong one she calls me popeye.

n she has that figure the sight will POP ur EYE.

that's the reason i call her assassin.

she has the greatest ASS.....AS IN........

there are many resons im addicted 2 her like cannabis sativa,

and yeah.....she is devout 2 me like josemaria escriva.

devout she don't mind wen i get some no strings attached,

because im her MARIONETTE, hers are the only strings i'm attached.

she don't sit and nag, she ain't larry king,

maybe the reason we tight like timon n pumba from the lion king.

and she wine it up 4 me like lil mama,

the more reason she b ma baby mama.

and she loves it when i grab her ass in PUBLIC.

n i love it in the dark corner of the PUB wen she gets dwn 2.......

she look so innocent like LITTLE RED HIDING HOOD,

but she aint so innocent in the dark of the lot in a LITTLE RED dress n im RIDING her on the HOOD of the car.

see i adore her like Baal,

and one day imma build her an african tahjmahaal.

and wen u mess wit ma dada IM MEAN,

might as well call me idi amin dada.

so yeah, you can call us bonnie n clyde.

because wen we aint 2gether its CYANIDE

 by meddy guru

LETS TALK CARS!!!

every man wants to own a car. momentarily, i prefer bikes. i do not know how to drive(i will repeat) i have this thing that i want the first car i drive to be my own. why? when i was in like class three, something happened. my dad had just been given this new company car-a Suzuki escudo. on the fateful day, he came home at say 8PM. soon afterwards, the security guard was on the door saying the windows weren't closed. so he gave me the key to go close them. the windows being electric,so i put the car in the ignition....and turned. next thing i remember, i was on the curb weeping, and the car....was in the trench. i had to write an apology letter...to my dad.hahaha
i woun't learn to drive unless it's my own car. but my first car woun't be/should't be a toyota, nissan or the likes. i have this stereotype that all cars from asia are fake. toyota, even if a prado remains...a toyota. they just have one engine and put them in different bodies. we were watching mega factories making of the Rolls Royce phantom with my pal babu. it takes 2 months to make one phantom. if it is wanted customized, making it one takes up to 6 months. the production plant produces just 5 of the cars a day. then babu said, if you went to toyota kenya, it would take them at most 2 weeks to assemble a car for you.

Rolls Royce Phantom

Mercedes 520 SEL

back to the mega factories. i was looking at how the rolls is made and my oh my. i have loved the phatom since i knew of it exsistence back in 2005. my wllpaper is of its massive 6.75 ltr V12 engine. most kenyans do not think luxury when they buy cars. considering my first articles where i said owning cars doesn't make economic sense, i wouldn't really consider fuel when getting a car. buy a car that gives what you can not measure. luxury would be one of those. our MPs are being driven about on the back-left of passats. not really luxurious but good for the country. personally, if it's not luxurious enough meaning you feel all the potholes that grace our roads, vibrate to your balls when you  ride on any hard surface and only has one air bag(the driver's) drive that car. however, if you own a LUXURY  car, get a driver and sit you ass on the back left. when you buy a rolls royce-get a driver.(guru quotes) my dream car is a Mercedes 520 sel...that's old school luxury at its best.back-left with a curtain to boot.

Mercedes Cross country

for most other kenyans, their dream car is a range rover sport.that goes for both males and females. i think its a chick's car. i've always said i would love my woman to have such wheels. and think of it, how sexy would that look? a man' SUV is a BMW X5...not X5 M. ama sonething like a Cross country Mercedes or  an escalade. so i did not get what the fuss was when Maina kageni bought an X6. i forgot i was talking about MEN...:P
women will never understand somethings we do like buy an old car and bring it back up. or why we soup them up and have mufflers on them that make crazy noises  and loud music that makes...a lot of noise. its boys being boys. and this what we do...

love old cars

a man's babe

pimp our rides

make irritating noise...

a woman driving a range...so sexy

making the old meet with the new in similar fashion

have a crazy ride

5 Reasons Not To Sleep With A Virgin

i adopted this article and thought you guys must read it....

View Nyang'au's blog

5 Reasons Not To Sleep With A Virgin
Taking a girl’s virginity is a popular male fantasy, but if they stopped to consider the reality of the situation, the fantasy might start to look more like a nightmare. It may be an ego boost to imagine being a girl’s first and taking her precious virginity, bookmarking yourself in the annexes of her mind forever. However, there are aspects of making her a woman that could be less than pleasurable. So, before you unlock that chastity belt, get an idea of what you’re getting yourself into. Here are five reasons not to sleep with a virgin that you should consider before taking the plunge.

1- There’s extra prep work

Unlike a more experienced woman, a virgin really doesn’t know what to expect. This means that you’re going to have to put in some effort before the deed is done and plan ahead to make sure that she’s comfortable and completely willing. It may take some considerable convincing on your part to get her into bed, and while that isn't one of our five reasons not to sleep with a virgin, your seduction skills will certainly be put to the test when it comes to taking a girl’s virginity. Also, the older she is, the harder it will be. If she has managed to protect her virginity all through high school and into her 20s, it will be that much more difficult to persuade her that she should give it up to you.
2- There’s a freak-out potential

When it comes to having sex with a virgin, the potential for her to freak out before, during or after the sex act is quite high. She may decide at the last minute that she doesn’t want to go through with it or she may feel massively guilty afterward for having done it. Because so much importance is put on her virginity, her first time is bound to be an emotional experience, which means that you might have to deal with panic, sadness, guilt, and other unpleasant reactions. She has probably imagined the event for a long time and wants it to go absolutely perfectly. If even the slightest thing doesn’t go according to plan, it could result in tears and tantrums. If you don’t like watching girls cry, don’t sleep with virgins. That’s a lot of pressure and that’s why it’s among our five reasons not to sleep with a virgin.

3- She’ll likely get attached

It is fairly likely that a recently devirginized girl will expect to have a lasting relationship with the guy that bedded her. If you’re not planning on becoming her boyfriend, or at least continuing to date her, don’t sleep with her. It’s really that simple. Very few girls imagine their first time with someone who drops off the face of the earth immediately afterward, never to be heard from again. She’s going to want you to stick around, so if a relationship is not in your plan, consider this point in our list of five reasons not to sleep with a virgin and find someone else to share your bed.
4- She lacks skills

Since she’s inexperienced, she’s probably not going to be that good in bed, and that’s a big reason not to sleep with a virgin. There are exceptions to this rule, of course, since there are plenty of skills a girl can learn before she loses her actual virginity. If, however, she has little experience with sexual activity in general, the encounter is not going to be all that pleasurable for you. If all you want is the power trip that comes from taking her virginity, then you’re golden, but if you want a mutually satisfying sexual experience, you should look for someone who has had time to develop some sexual skills.
5- It could get messy

There is a possibility that having sex with a virgin could literally make a mess of your sheets. Being penetrated for the first time is likely to hurt her and it could result in some bleeding. If the sight of blood makes you squeamish, devirginizing a girl is not for you. A woman’s first sexual experience can leave a very unsexy mess to clean up.
where no man has gone before

As you can see, taking a girl’s virginity is not all that it’s cracked up to be. There are groundwork concerns, emotional issues, commitment questions, technique problems, and other more tangible messes to deal with. So perhaps you should leave the devirginizing to the high school boys and look for a sexual encounter that isn’t quite so complicated.

http://walalahoi.ning.com/profiles/blogs/5-reasons-not-to-sleep-with-a

CHEATING

most of you have watched cheaters on K24, and if not, at least you have heard of it. it airs daily, but the original show from North Texas started in the year 2000 and has over 200 episodes and has 10 seasons. considering that the cases are mostly concentrated in a very small area, they are staggering statistics. in my point of view, this is a very sound business idea. genius actually...you have detectives, counselling, lawyers, the tv itself and obviously ads.... never mind that the whole thing is a hoax.but that's beside the point. many of the victims in the series are women. it's rare to find a man being cheated on by a spouse.

its known for a fact that women think with their hearts and as for us men...that organ would be our dicks. it's unfortunate, sometimes we try very hard but... if you watch the show carefully enough, you would realize no man just cheats. there are reasons, most of them very valid. personally, i have strayed on numerous occasions, and if you asked me why, i would give you plausible reasons. if the sex is not good enough and i tell her but she still does not work on it, if she can not listen to my problems and i get a lady who does, with time one thing will lead to another, when all your girl does is whine and nag all the time and mostly when we have just got to bed and i just want some time to recap my day and plan the next one, when your girl starts rationing sex.... the reasons are many and vary from person to person. t not only men are cheating though. statistically, younger people are more likely candidates of cheating; in fact, younger women are as likely as younger men to be unfaithful. it's a problem that faces us all.

i have always had this weird wish...that i would walk in on my spouse cheating on me with another man. think of that old R Kelly and P Diddy(then known as puff daddy) song-Satisfy you. yeah weird...i know.  it would be devastating, but the events that would follow... i would just walk out. eventually she would come crying and begging you to take her back and the apologies. there's nothing that's more satisfying. if she wouldn't come back, to bad. it wasn't worth the stress in the first place. because relationships are stress most times. another song that comes to mind is the longs series of songs by R Kelly-trapped in the closet. it would hurt 10 fold if it came to your knowledge that your spouse was cheating on you with someone of the same sex. do not lie to yourself that you would be singing 'my girl got a girlfriend'. the question that will obviously play over and over in your head would be...'WTF?' what could have driven her that far away? even if you eventually had a  threesome. as is common knowledge one of the participants is an outcast  and you do not need to second guess who that would be.

there are many remedies to cheating. the liberal ones would say polygamy. the kinky ones would swing. crazy ones let their spouses have sex with other people as they watch. what i think...communication. if i got what i wanted from whoever it was that i'm dating, i would't stray. after all, all vagainas are just that and so are boobs and arses. however, if i told you the girl i preffered this and she said she would work on it but didn't.then i reminded her again...and again, but nothing. TOO BAD. if you can't do it, i would respect your decision. but if it is so important to me, we would just break up.in marriage, that's tricky...

references:

cheaters being a sham-http://thatunfreshfeeling.blogspot.com/2009/11/cheaters-was-fraud.html

cheating stats-http://www.menstuff.org/issues/byissue/infidelitystats.html

MEN AND GETTING INTO RELATIONSHIPS

yesterday i talked about how women are selfish with well....almost everything. the thing is, we keep supporting them. i will mention my being single for more than a year...again. i have had a couple of chicks on my list, but the allure of a chase sipped out of me long time. playing hard to get to me is ancient.we live in a world where we can't afford to waste any time let lone resources, we are always up and down doing this or that. but there are other reasons i am still single. i search for 2 things in a girl. one, tht we can communicate and understand each other. if we can not make useful conversations no reveal our thoughts and feelings to each other, how would we date? second, that i can at least present you to my pals. if i wouldn't be comfortable with you around them, it would't work out.that's why most the girls i know have never met my close circle of pals...nothing personal. another issue that i consider, is equality in the relationship.

they say in every relationship there's always one who reaches out and another who is reached out for. i can't date you if it looks like i am doing myself a favor by dating you. if you are the only one who calls, foots the bill, seems like you are getting cheated on most of the time...it ain't worth it. according to me, for  relationship to be balanced,the chick has to be the one reaching out. from history we have heard women marrying men who are older, taller, more muscular. it was all about safety those days. these days, the physical part of relationships has been undermined. or rather, we pretend that we do not care, but we are just living in denial. in relationships where one feels inadequate, they tend to do weird things. low self esteem shouldn't exist in a relationship mostly on the man's part. being the man in a relationship is not possible if you are feeling inadequate.

i remember my first chick. i vibed her for more than a year. that was in 2003, you remember when we still had land lines in our homes. after homework, i would call this chick, almost daily. unluckily for me, it was mostly her mum or dad who picked and they had to then divert me to her.this went on for months, i called and we often talked for a while, but i never got much reciprocation.i asked her to be my girl but waited for like two terms just to be told, 'i would, but i'm afraid of how Shem(another guy in class who had set sights on her) would feel'. so i went on that long December holiday distraught, but come the next year, my final year, i was back to my normal self.free of burden. luckily or unluckily,Shem transfered to another school so  didn't make it beginning of the year. i was indifferent about the whole issue, it was obvious i wasn't really wanted.weeks passed then events started unfolding. some girls started up the whole issue of how Shem was now out of the picture, i took to it, popped the question again and this time i was accepted to my delight. it was a crazy relationship. we never did anything, not even hold hands, kissed just once by accident and what hurt me most is that on valz wen i shop liffted that gift i mentioned some time back, almost the whole class had a taste of it, most except me of course.

you do not want a woman sitting on your head. ask someone who has a woman for a boss, they know.so if you are not at par with a chick in a relationship, u better off not being with her. think about it...